THE ONLY WAY TO SAY BLACK LIVES MATTER
This is for the folks who can’t say BLACK LIVES MATTER without a “but” or an “and” or a tiny little comma.
This is for folks who think “all lives matter” says the same thing only differently or better and feel a need to say so.
This is for folks who see the words BLACK LIVES MATTER and feel excluded:
BLACK LIVES MATTER is three words long.
The only way to say it is to use all three words. Only those three. In that order.
And then take a breath.
Follow those three words with a period.
Follow those three words with an exclamation mark!
Skip the punctuation at all or begin with a #hashtag.
But say all three words and only those three and then take a breath.
After the breath, you can repeat it over and over as much as you like. Fill the air or a sign or a text box with it. Say anything else that heals.
But, first, just say it right: three words in order and a breath.
BLACK LIVES MATTER
Do not begin with “I know…” or “I’ve always believed…” or “as a white person…” or any version of “I never,” to frame the discussion around yourself, because sure as anything you will not be able to complete that thought with just BLACK LIVES MATTER and a breath. You will “but” and “and” or comma your way out of sitting in the space of those three words.
BLACK LIVES MATTER is a complete sentence.
You’re indignant. I am going too far. It sounds like I am saying you can never use BLACK LIVES MATTER in any sentence other than itself.
Here’s a test to see if you can:
First, say BLACK LIVES MATTER out loud to someone who can hear you. And then stop.
Give it a minute. Don’t qualify. Don’t follow up.
Sit in the space where
the words themselves do the talking
without talking about you at all.
If you can do that, you’re on your way to using BLACK LIVES MATTER in other ways, as an adjective or a maybe a noun. You’re in a place to start turning that into conversations — with yourself as much as with others.
If you can’t do it,
if you can’t say BLACK LIVES MATTER
all by itself,
if it’s a struggle,
if you feel attacked,
or left out,
ask yourself why it’s so damn hard
to say three words and stop.
What makes your whole body cry out to replace one word? (You know which one.)
Why are you so quick to fire the velvet bullet of “all lives matter”?
Maybe it’s because you like your violence gentle.
Or that you’re hoping Kool-Aid masks the taste of the poison.
Or maybe it’s the unspoken comfort in feeling hurt and superior all at once,
the privilege of being afraid without being in danger.
Maybe you just can’t find a nicer way to say you’re glad you’re not black.
Does that sting?
Does it seem unfair?
Disprove it.
Make it untrue.
Change.
Start by saying BLACK LIVES MATTER.
And only that.
Say BLACK LIVES MATTER and stop.
Say BLACK LIVES MATTER
and take a breath
because you
still can.
